Michael Shook, Genesis Class Leader, LIFT Leader, and St. Luke’s Member for 7 years

Romans 14:13

“Therefore, let us stop passing judgment on one another. Instead, make up your mind not to put any stumbling block or obstacle in the way of a brother or sister.” 

Reflection:

In my family, we are experts at telling each other how to live our lives.  We tell each other how to raise our kids, how to spend our money, how to vote, and how to believe.  Unfortunately, for most of my life, I thought this was how people loved, how we helped one another by offering the value of our insight.  And while my family somehow seems to make our family culture work, I have often found with friends and other people that this method of “helping, loving, or persuading people” is viewed as judging or insulting to others, especially when it comes to faith.  

At St. Luke’s our Five Inside-Out Habits and the order they’re in has really helped me to understand what a neighbor looks like and how a neighbor is supposed to behave. You see, I thought a neighbor was transparent and told you about a better way to live, love, or be happy; neighbors offered advice. The St. Luke’s Five Habits are: to Pray and Worship, Study the Bible, Make Friends, Share our Stories, and Give Ourselves Away in Generosity and Service. They are meant to be a guide to not only our Christian Journey but in how to be a good neighbor.  

What I have learned is that a neighbor is first a friend, not expecting others to do anything in return. A neighbor earns trust by offering an example of a better way to live, through Christ, without judging the way people live or think today.

Throughout the pandemic, I have noticed a big change in my attitude. You see, my wife Shella manages the COVID unit at Methodist Hospital Medical Center and as such, you can imagine my fervor for wearing masks, practicing social distancing, and taking vaccines to prevent the spread of COVID. I tell people all the time, masks aren’t about what I believe in terms of virology, vaccines, or politics; for me, masks are about helping my wife to not work 14 hours a day.  

Initially, because of my wife’s very stressful work life, I found myself frustrated with those who didn’t share my level of fervor. However, recently I have found that by simply trying to understand someone’s point of view when it comes to their COVID attitudes, I am less stressed and able to be a better neighbor. You see, making friends and building trust has become more important to me than what a person believes about any subject, including COVID. Having the objective to make friends, before telling my story or sharing my point of view, has allowed me to deeply comprehend how to first “seek to understand, before being understood.” 

A neighbor is a person who first seeks to understand, first tries to be a neighbor who builds trust and respect in others, despite their viewpoints, politics, or beliefs. Once we build that friendship with others, and form that bond of trust, then all become our brothers and sisters, our neighbors. Only then, without judgment, can we share the stories of our lives and be examples to others as imperfect yet striving Christians.      

So, might I offer to you that becoming a neighbor starts with managing our own judgments about others, and focusing on what we can serve in others, without judging whether someone deserves our service. Once we have mastered our own judgment attitudes and moved to try to understand people empathetically, we can then find the energy and passion to fulfill our Christian responsibility to treat our neighbors as ourselves.    

Prayer:

Father God, help me with my attitude of the judgment of others. Help me to see other people as my neighbor and worthy of my energy, passion, and service in sharing my life with them.  In Jesus’ name, I pray for these things. Amen.