Rachel Fisher

Romans 15:5 (ESV)

5 May the God who gives endurance and encouragement give you the same attitude of mind toward each other that Christ Jesus had, 6 so that with one mind and one voice you may glorify the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ.

Reflection:

What did you dread most in elementary school? Personally, it was not spelling tests or pop quizzes I despised; contrastly, the bane of my childhood was being forced to do group projects. I always loathed these collaborative assignments because they seemed to inevitably drive a wedge between me and my classmates, some of whom were even my closest friends. I longingly yearned for solo work, deeming my own vision superior and any setbacks I encountered my personal responsibility. By “fending for myself”, I could rest easy knowing that the end result was precisely what I deserved.

Carrying this same zeal for single-minded self-growth into adulthood, on January 1st I was inspired to write down several goals for the upcoming year. Feeling incredibly encouraged and clear-headed about the future, I eagerly committed myself to striving for success, focusing on the concrete steps I must take to make it happen.

We are currently at the halfway point of 2021, and I can unabashedly say that I have worked really, really hard. Like, pat-yourself-on-the-back-at-the-end-of-the-day kind of gratification. Everything has gone according to plan; even in some cases exceeding my imagination. Realistically, I have done all I can do on my end…which means I now must pass this work off to my peers.

Wait a minute, this was not what I wanted!

As I transport myself back to all those group projects –excruciatingly anticipating the actions of my counterparts – I cannot help but wonder: “Is it them…or is it me?”

You must understand, I am naturally a very outgoing person: I would much prefer to be with people than by myself. Yet somehow to the opposite effect, I sincerely wish I did not have to rely on others to manifest my objectives….from where does this stark disconnect stem?

I could make a million excuses, but the truth behind my difficulty with collaboration is a simple answer: I lack faith. Not in myself, not even in God, but rather, I severely lack faith in others.

The problem with this mentality of “going it alone” is that we were not designed this way. No, God created us to be in community, and not just when times are fun and cheery. But working alongside someone else is hard. Allowing a new leader to take charge is hard. Believing in others is hard.

Too often I forget, though, that most things worth doing are hard. Because it is through this difficulty that we are presented an opportunity to see the world as Christ does. Just as God grants me the free will to make my own path, so should I release the notion that my plans are the only ones worth following.

You see, God did not place these desires and drive in my heart only for me to be crushed by anxiety… Rather, God is tenderly calling me to serendipitous relief from the integral foundation of all healthy relationships: trust.

In order to bring the Kingdom of God to my world, I must trust that my skills and dedication will see me through. I must trust that the people with whom I have associated will do what is best. I must trust that Jesus loves me and will never let me down, even when my world feels like it is crumbling around me.

One of my favorite Star Wars quotes comes from the wise, fatherly protagonist, Qui-Gon Jinn: “Your focus determines your reality.” As much as I wish this philosophy implies that I control how well my achievements and accomplishments shall flourish if I give it my all, what it really describes is how my own stance dictates my position in the ever-changing—and often chaotic—world around me. If my sole focus is moving forward alone, lonely shall I be. But through leaning on my faith and trusting others is my life filled with true, heavenly joy. And that is the only reality worth pursuing.

Prayer: Dear Lord, I ask that you be with me. Show me how to live faithfully as your servant, taking care to ensure I see you in each and every person. Help me live the life for which you so lovingly have set glorious plans. Thank you for the grace of doing life with others and bright days ahead. Amen.