Charity Autry, Member since 2008, Families in Faith Sunday School Leader, Starting Point Leader, VBS Chair (Children’s Ministry Council)

Proverbs 17:17 (New International Version)
17 A friend loves at all times,
and a brother is born for a time of adversity.

Reflection:
Simple, easy, “A friend loves at all times.”  It is easy to say, harder to do. What kind of friend are you?   Are you a true friend that is always present or are you an only “at my convenience friend”?  Being a friend is needed when someone is going through adversity, but you are also called to be a friend when you are going through adversity. This is the hard part. This proverb is here to tell us we are called to be true friends, and during the tough times we are, even more, we are a “brother.”  Being a true friend that will love “at all times” and unconditionally takes practice and continued work, much like a marriage. You will need to learn to not be judgmental, be forgiving, and be compassionate. Basically, we are to live and love like Jesus, the true example of a friend.

In your youth, you may have recited Proverbs 17:17 at Sunday School or at a Mother’s Day Out program.   We teach our children to love others, to share, to be compassionate, and to help a friend when they are in need. As we become older, we grow cynical and judgmental. Once our friends wrong us in any way or we do not agree with them on issues, we tend to pull away—“unfriend” them.  In true “Friends” fashion we take a “break.”  In the 1990’s sitcom, Friends, the “We Were on a Break” episode is epic.  However, to be a true friend, there are no breaks.  We are called to stick around even when the relationship is struggling. Currently, lots of friendships are struggling due to distance and time.  To be a friend that “loves at all times” we must make more of an effort.

My husband is wonderful at building friendships and being intentional.  He knows all our friend’s birthdays and anniversaries.  He makes sure to call or text his friends on these important dates—this takes work. Touching base and being involved keeps them connected.  He has known his best friend since they were five-years-old, they met in Kindergarten. He has nourished this relationship for almost forty years.  My husband knows how to build and nourish relationships by being intentional.  By watching him, I have learned how to be a better friend.

I have also learned how to be a friend by watching my friends. Ten years ago, I stepped into a bible study for mothers of young children at the church. I had a toddler and soon to be pregnant with my second child.  I was tired, lost, and needed friends that were going through the same things I was.  Little did I know that these women would encourage me when I thought I was a terrible mother, support me when I needed it, and just be there “at all times.”   We have been there for each other through the loss of parents, life struggles, and everyday adversities. They have taught me not only to be a better mother but to be a better friend. I will always be grateful for each and every one of them.

We are not only benefiting our friends but the relationships we build benefit ourselves. Friends keep us honest. Friends keep us humble. Friends keep us closer to God. Is there a friend that you may have lost touch with due to our pandemic circumstances? Friends, today we must make an even bigger effort to be a good friend.  It is easy to hide in our homes and create a bubble. However, there are people out there that need you and your friendship. Now more than ever, we should love at all times.

Prayer:
Thank you, God, for giving us an example of what a true friend is. You provided the best example in Jesus, who loved at all times.  Please help us to put our judgments and laziness aside and be intentional friends. Thank you for being our best friend. Amen.